As ever, I always promote my readers to submit any relationship or dating questions they may have and one I have recently been asked is how to handle an ex texting you merry Christmas. The answer is all dependent on your current relationship status, the closeness to your ex partner and how the relationship ended, plus how you are on an emotional level. So let’s start with number one.
Talking To A Partner
The worst scenario that could happen would be a partner seeing a message from your ex messaging Merry Christmas and thinking you kept it a secret. Even worse, if they see you respond then they could feel hurt or let down. Ex relationships are a tough area, therefore honesty is often the best option. If you receive a message from your ex, you should openly communicate with your new partner, as no lies should be kept in this area, even if it leads to an argument.
You should also highlight that you want them to know as you want complete honesty in your relationship and you wouldn’t want to keep quiet in case they misperceived this as an emotional response.
Responding To The Ex
This is again dependent on your current relationship status and how you feel about your ex. Often a casual message is worthwhile, stating your good wishes back, but that you shouldn’t really be communicating any more due to your new relationship.
If you do respond, a danger is that they may then begin properly communicating with you, seeing your response as an openness to talking together, which can lead to murky waters.
Did It End Badly
Maybe they cheated, maybe it was an argumentative end or they handled it terribly, either way, communication should be removed. If you’ve already removed them from Facebook and all other social platforms, don’t hesitate to block their phone number.
To block a phone number on your mobile, you just need to go through your call history, find the number and click through, then select ‘block contact’. If this doesn’t show on your phone, then it could be through the settings, where you can highlight numbers under ‘reject calls’. However, you go about it, don’t feel bad about blocking out an ex, you don’t want to hold on to a past love.
Why Are They Messaging Me?
Something important to remember is you are not alone. It is believed around 10% of us receive a message around Christmas from a past lover.
It could be for multiple reasons. They could simply be going through their number and messaging everyone Merry Christmas, hence the reason you might not want to respond with an onslaught of insults. On the other hand, the winter months are when most people settle down, hence ‘cuffing season’, while they might also be thinking about special times of the past. It is an easy excuse to get back in contact, so you do have to always be wary.
Whatever the reason, there is a right and a wrong way of handling the situation, you just need to treat it in a dignified way and hold temptation to respond by offering to meet up or telling them to go **** off.
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