Dealing with a heartbreak is one of the most difficult things we have to go through in our lives, even when we look back months later and laugh it off. But the initial dealing process shouldn’t be underestimated by anyone. Fortunately there are some quick tricks you can try in order to easily get over your ex without spending the entire time on the sofa with a box of tissues.
1) Rubber Band
Place a rubber band around your arm (not one so tight it constrains the blood flow) and every time you think of your ex, you snap the rubber band so it causes a little bit of pain to your arm. This is a well documented practice in order to associate a negative emotion with your ex and to, figuratively speaking, punish yourself for thinking about them. It will stop you dwelling on the subject and allow you to quickly focus on something else.
2) Make Arrangements
Meet your family, meet friends, meet a potential partner, who ever you meet, make sure your time is full. It’s when sat at home alone and with not much going on that your mind wonders to such topics. If you keep yourself busy then this should limit the amount you think about your ex.
3) Remove Reminders
Whether it’s the toothbrush in the bathroom or the soft toy they bought you, you need to remove anything that reminds you of them. I’m not talking about binning a widescreen TV they may have got you for Christmas, but anything that has a strong emotional connection to them. For many, this could be jewellery or something you took home from a holiday together. If you’re likely to see it through the recovery process then it is likely to make you step backwards.
4) Delete & Block
Remove and block their phone number. Remove them from social media. Simply get rid of them anywhere. It can be tempting to check what they have been up to and checking to see whether they have moved on, but the only person this affects is you and not in a good way. They are hardly going to make a post about how breaking up with you was the worst thing they ever could have done, so drop them from social and make sure you don’t re-add them.
5) Consider Where You Will Bump Into Each Other
Do you go to the same events? Or maybe you both shop in the same area. I’m not saying one of you has to cut off part of your life, not by a long shot, but you should try to temporarily limit the amount of interactions where possible. This does involve avoiding a pub you both used to love visiting on a regular basis.
6) ‘Get Busy Living Or Get Busy Dying’
I couldn’t help sneak in that quote. It is easy to lie on a sofa, buy some ice cream and have a binge session on Netflix. But how has your life progressed? How many times do you think you will think about your ex? If you jump into something, such as the gym, learning a musical instrument or writing a blog, you could re-direct that effort in a positive way, keep yourself mentally occupied and come out of the process with a key skill or asset.
7) Ask Friends For Help
How many times do we tell our friends we’re fine, but think the complete opposite. Tell your friends you need their support and if they are true BFF’s then they will be by your side, distracting you at every opportunity. They will make sure to invite you out and if you just want to sit on your sofa and binge watch TV then they should be right next to you.
8) Play Positive
Listening to Adele, playing heart wrenching romantic comedies and busting out the prosecco in a living room karaoke of depression might be enticing, but you are the owner of your own mood. It might not feel like it, but you can snap yourself into a positive mood through a number of methods and the last thing you should be doing is surrounding yourself in sad music. Many have reported playing music like ‘don’t worry, be happy’ has had an incredibly positive affect on their moods and helped them to think about the positives. Playing videos of yourself on holiday (before your ex or with friends) can remind you of the great times before they were in your life. Opt for a movie with a feel-good happy ending.
9) Book A Holiday
If you’re friends are available, perfect! If not, why not try solo travel? Taking a holiday can help you to completely escape reality, while booking a holiday can allow you to have something in front of you to get excited about, stopping that feeling of doom and gloom. Even if its starting the process of saving for travelling and working out where you’d like to go.
10) Do Things For Yourself
For however long you have been in a relationship, you have had to consider both parties. While you could focus on the negative aspects to being single, think about all the things you couldn’t do before. Write up a list and start ticking them all off. Focus 100% on yourself, you are the most important person and it’s me-time. Write up your very own 12 month bucket list and work out exactly what YOU would like to do this year.